ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
