I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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