i really wish james franco would like my vagina
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
