I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
