Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
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