So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize