Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
After last night, I could never be a politician.
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
Randomize