I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
