he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
