I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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