is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Randomize