how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
why do cheetos always look like penises
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
foreskin is a definite game changer
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
Couch. On fire.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
