I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Randomize