real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Randomize
