I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I think my vagina is haunted
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
