he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
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