the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
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