We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
