I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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