Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
