You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Randomize
