It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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