Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
