i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
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