she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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