I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
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