Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize
