i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Randomize
