Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
