I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
