you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Randomize
