I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Randomize
