We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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