just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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