Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Randomize
