we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Randomize
