can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I am spending my child support on dildos
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
I just sucked dick on a ferry
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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