How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
