Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Randomize
