no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Randomize