you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
This is my gift to your gina
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Randomize
