my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Randomize
