girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
Randomize