OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Randomize
