my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
