the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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