if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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