i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Who died my cat blue again?
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
