What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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