The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Randomize